Personal occasions
Sympathy card wording
Most people write nothing because they cannot find the right words, and the person receiving nothing notices. There are no right words. A short card that names the person who died and says one true thing is better than a long one that reaches for meaning, and far better than silence.
Written by Autopen Australia · Updated
When you knew the person who died
[FIRST NAME], I was so sorry to hear about [NAME]. [SPECIFIC MEMORY]. I will miss him, and I am thinking of you.
[FIRST NAME], I keep thinking about [NAME] and the way she [SPECIFIC THING]. What a loss. Thinking of you all.
When you did not know them
Do not pretend. Write about the person you do know.
[FIRST NAME], I never met your father, but I know what he meant to you from how often you spoke about him. I am so sorry.
Offering something concrete
[FIRST NAME], so sorry about [NAME]. I am going to drop a meal over on Thursday and leave it at the door - no need to answer or reply to this.
[FIRST NAME], thinking of you. I will ring you in a fortnight, when the house has gone quiet and everyone else has stopped calling.
From a business to a client or colleague
Keep the business entirely out of it. No logo, no signature block, no reference to work.
[FIRST NAME], we were very sorry to hear about [NAME]. Please do not think about anything at this end. Take whatever time you need.
[SIGNATORY]
On the first anniversary
The hardest day of the year for the bereaved and the one on which almost nobody writes, because everybody assumes it would be intrusive. It is the opposite.
[FIRST NAME], thinking of you today. A year since [NAME]. I have not forgotten and I did not want you to think everyone else had.
Getting it right
- What to mention. The name of the person who died. One specific memory if you have one, however small. An offer that is concrete enough to accept.
- What to leave out. "At least", in any construction. "Everything happens for a reason". "Let me know if you need anything", which puts the work on the bereaved person. Religious framing unless you know it is shared.
- How long. 20 to 60 words. Short is not a failure here; short is correct.
- How personal. Plain. Formality creates distance at the moment distance is least wanted, and so does trying to be profound.
- When not to send one. There is no wrong time. A card that arrives two months later, when everyone else has stopped, is often the one that is remembered.
Personalising more than a handful
The fields that earn their place here: [FIRST NAME], [NAME].
A sympathy card is the one piece of correspondence that should not be produced at volume, and we would decline the job. The wording here is for writing by hand, one at a time. The only related work we would take on is acknowledgement cards sent by a family afterwards.
Before any run, read the piece with the longest value in your data, the shortest, and the empty one. If all three read as English the merge is sound. Personalising direct mail at scale covers the rest.
Sending these at volume
This is not a page with a production problem attached. If you are on the other side of it and facing a pile of acknowledgement cards to send after a funeral, that is a different and more practical question.
Autopen Australia writes each piece individually with a real ballpoint.
Writing acknowledgement cards after a funeral? Funeral thank-you wording
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Writing more of these than you have evenings
Tell us roughly how many and what they say. We will come back with an exact price and a production window.